Although Aiwass in Isabel's mouth seemed to be in the third person... But Aleister felt the overwhelming emotion.
And Isabel continued:
"Before I really fell in love with him... I had awe, dependence and trust in him. Even though we were peers, I felt The love and reliability of elders.
“And then came curiosity... I was very curious at the time - was this really the complete him? Is he really that young? Is this some kind of performance? Or is it that under that layer of omniscient and omnipotent, god-like light, he still has an ulterior and ferocious flesh and blood? ”
After that uncontrollable curiosity, Isabel gradually felt the gentleness and reliability of Aiwass.
He was like an excellent commander, like a wise monarch, Or a loving grandfather, a doting brother... At first, Isabel didn't feel love because Aiwass was too far away from her at that time.
"But now. Among these complex emotions, I gradually peeled away Aiwass's soul. And I unexpectedly... caught something deep in his heart. "
——That is a hint of "Aiwass's mortal nature".
"That is the melancholy, timidity, inferiority and panic in Aiwass's heart. He never showed these things to the public. Only after Aiwass completely relaxed in front of me, he secretly released a little and then quickly took it back. It was like he was afraid that I would discover this secret... But what I didn't tell him was that I had actually felt it for a long time, but I didn't say it because I cared about his self-esteem.
"You must know...the path of beauty is the path that has the strongest perception of people's hearts."
Isabel whispered in Aleister's ear: "Actually...this is the reason why I really fell in love with him."
Her feelings for Aiwass changed from "like" to "love" for two reasons.
When she had just succeeded to the throne and was extremely exhausted, she immediately thought of Aiwass. Only in his arms could she, "Her Majesty the Queen," cry with peace of mind.
At that time, she knew that she could never leave Aiwass again.
Although Isabel has been a crybaby since she was a child, she has never cried in front of others.
The more you are looked down upon by others as a child, the stronger your self-esteem becomes, almost paranoid -
However, people cannot truly fall in love with gods.
People's reverence for idols is nothing but false love. It is love for the perfect person in your heart, but it never points to the other person's true heart.
Because of this, Isabel's self-esteem prevents her from accepting love that comes and goes - if Aiwass loves her selflessly, but does not desire anything in return or pursue anything from her , then she cannot accept this kind of equal love as "God loves all people". Because she cannot accept that she is meaningless in this relationship.
"...Fortunately," Isabel leaned closer to Aleister's ear and murmured softly, "When I cried on his chest, I heard his heart also crying silently. ”
When she collapsed completely, Aiwass also showed a moment of vulnerability in front of her that was not even revealed... At that moment, she realized that they could indeed Couples who support each other to the end, not just lovers who have "like" and "attachment"
"Let me guess. "
She whispered: "What Lord Aiwass said at that time... [So, stop crying].
"You are also saying it to yourself, right?"
At that moment...at that moment, the shell of the glorious statue named "Aiwass" suddenly cracked .
The person who hugged her at that time was not her all-powerful and loyal minister, but a young boy who was equally melancholy and restless.
Just like Aiwass’s violent reaction when he received the hand-knitted sweater as a gift from his grandmother - it was better than every carefully drawn magic painting he gave Aiwass. At that time, Isabel still had some taste for food, but it was not until then that she truly understood everything.
Aiwass is not perfect, he just hides all his wounds and is strong alone.
Even in front of himself, he would never admit or accept his vulnerability...but his own crying could dissolve the ice in his heart.
“A person who wants to laugh but cannot laugh will want to see others laugh; similarly, a person who wants to cry but cannot cry will also want to see others cry... Therefore, a deep People who have deeply experienced sorrow are either wanton tyrants or good doctors who heal the soul."
Isabel said softly.
She has received a "well-rounded" education in the path of beauty. Therefore, she knows that the purpose of people watching tragedy is to release fear, satisfy pity, inspire grief and anger, and enhance determination...
It is not wine, but bitter medicine - a medicinal soup to heal a numb mind. .
It was also from then on that Aiwass began to gradually show his less perfect side. He gradually released his vigilance, like a snail gradually poking out of its shell, exposing his fragile and fatal softness to Isabel.
And now, with the separation of Aiwass... his complicated heart has also been dismembered and disemboweled.
Just like medical specimens will expose different internal organs to the outside, Isabel can also read her true heart from Aleister more clearly.
Once the sublimity of self-sacrifice for a higher purpose is lost, the humanity in Aleister becomes so clear.
"Don't be afraid."
Isabel murmured softly, hugging Aleister, who looked immature and childish in front of her, like a gentle mother, and conveyed her words to The most vulnerable part of Aiwass: "Cry freely, girl. I will be with you."
That was what Aiwass once said to Isabel in the past... similar but opposite.
Aleister did not look back or make a sound.
Halfway through Isabel’s words, her eyes became moist.
It was as if he had watched a sad movie, and as if the grievances and fears that had been accumulated for a long time were finally released. When Aleister blinked gently again, a line of tears fell slowly. .
Suddenly, the black-haired girl turned back with her eyes closed and shrank into Isabel's arms.
"I...I lied..."
Aleister sobbed softly: "I don't want to disappear...I don't want to be forgotten..."
After the first whimper, her crying gradually became louder.
That is something Aiwass, a man, would never do - even if one day he breaks down emotionally, he will just huddle in a corner and drink alone, even if he doesn't know how to drink at all.
All he can do is to comfort himself with the pain of self-inflicted pain, like a knife wound deep in his throat. Every time he swallows the bitter water, he will feel the pain. Severe pain. And this way he won't be able to taste the bitter taste.
Because once he falls, the world will be destroyed.
Aiwass has no room to give up - there are no great "players" in this world who can solve all disasters and can defeat any strong enemy. The only one he can rely on is himself. He didn't have to do anything... just watch, and everything would eventually lead to destruction.
One version of disaster after another. One after another incredibly powerful boss. The game played by the gods, the fate of the chess pieces, and another future that is destined to be destroyed... everything is accumulated in one person.
A mortal is burdened with such a heavy fate.
Aiwass must remain strong - until the very end, to blaze a new trail for the entire world.
He was never afraid of sacrifice. I'm just worried that after my premature sacrifice, the remaining crises that will follow will still destroy the world.
Of course he has his own desires and his own love as a mortal. He also wants to enjoy life, he wants to study comfortably on campus, he wants to play with Isabel in the palace, he wants to enjoy the glory and wealth of his life as a rich man, he wants to be a great person and help Anyone he wanted to help.
But he couldn't do it.
"Future" is like a magic spell, pushing him to leave one place after another where he developed feelings and go to one scene after another where disaster will occur. Sometimes he also wants to tell others about the future he carries...
But in this world, there are no absolute secrets anywhere. Whether it is in the dream world or the material world, as long as the words are spoken and written, many people and gods will have a way to know, and the future is destined to twist in a direction that Aiwass cannot predict.
So Aiwass must be strong.
He has a reason to move on.
…But Aleister is different.
Her body is that of a little girl, even underage, and she will burst into tears if she is slightly hurt; her race is the son of the moon, and she is famous for her uncontrollable emotions; she was born less than a child Month, her life span is less than half a year; her name is not Aiwass, but Aleister...
——In this case, it doesn’t matter even if you can’t help crying, right?
"Cry, just cry. You are already drunk...it is so strong to only cry in your dreams."
Isabel whispered softly. : "Aleister...can I call you Alai?
"That's it, Alai. I swear... no matter what, if Aiwass and I have a child, regardless of gender... the first child will be named Aleister. I will love Aleister as much as I love myself until the end of my life.
"As long as I am here, you will not be forgotten. And I also believe that Aiwass will not let you disappear completely. Because he would rather die than hurt a loved one. He has such tenderness. You and he both have it.”
Isabel patted Aleister’s back gently and hugged this girl who was so light that she could easily lift him. In arms.
This girl who was so dangerous that she could single-handedly kill extremely dangerous demons was like a cat that was afraid of the cold, instinctively curling up in Isabel's arms.
She felt the weight of the girl's body, and her painful spirit that was thinner than her body - what kind of weight did this carry to make a brilliant and sacred soul like Aiwass full of energy? Scars?
At this time, Isabel felt the loneliness, pain, sadness, and fear that Aiwass had hidden very deeply and clearly.
...It was like encountering a crisis that could destroy the world with one wrong move, but he had to solve it himself without telling anyone during the period.
Isabel vaguely sensed the pressure on Aiwass.
She knew she couldn't help Aiwass save the world. She was already sweating profusely just dealing with Avalon's many problems.
But she can save Aiwass, and now Aleister.
The government affairs accumulated in Avalon and the love words accumulated in her heart can all be suppressed at this moment.
The most important thing is to heal the older child’s long-damaged mind.
"Cry...I love you."
Isabel closed her eyes slightly, her emerald-like pupils looking at Aleister compassionately.
At this moment, she deeply realized the beauty of "dedication", just like an actor gradually entering into the play... She gradually fully understood what Aiwass was thinking.
At this moment she is holding Aleister, but she looks like AiwassIt's like holding his own clone.
If she leaves this dream again, she is already confident that she can make Aiwass's mask.
And Aleister - after sobbing, under the illumination of that warm light, her crying gradually became louder and gradually turned into a howl.
The crying turned into shouting, became hysterical, even broke the voice, and was so hard that it seemed like vomiting.
At the end, the weak sobbing was no longer heard, but more like an irrational instinctive roar, venting the fear of life and death.
——And this is just like the first cry of a baby born into the world, announcing the true birth of a life. The transcoding has been serious recently, which makes us more motivated and updates faster. Please use your little hands to exit the reading mode. Thank you